Yeah here's the first chapter of my writing piece that ended up somewhere between short story and short novel. In 12 pt. font it was 22 pages so I guess you can judge that for yourself. It is titled "Felix and Delilah" First of all, no, its not a love story or a romance of any kind, unless you look at it in a dark twisted sort of way. Yes, I actually did write this, even though it sounds like a second grader. So here it is. By the way thanks again Irishtoaster for letting me know this was worth it. The paragraph system in this commenting thing is really annoying so it seems a lot longer than it actually is. Please be patient and at least read the Preface.
Preface
Temptation is an overwhelming emotion, as some people know quite well. Temptation exists all around you, in various shapes and forms, most masked by the attractive disguise of popularity or acceptance. Instant gratification always seems like an economically wise option, but the man who allows himself to be consumed by temptation will notice that it hurts him and anyone and everyone close to him.
If you do not believe me, read the story of Adam and Eve. They gave into temptation in the form of an apple. They were rejected from the Garden of Eden forever. "This doesn't apply to me," you may say. "I eat apples almost every day, and I never lived in any Garden of Eden. This Narrator must be a great fool." I assure you, I am no fool. Although the story of Adam and Eve did take place thousands of years ago, temptation still exists, for some people more prominently than others.
If you do not believe me, and even if you do, read the story of Felix and Delilah. It is a more modern portrayal of human susceptibility to temptation. It is about a boy named Felix, a child who was unprepared for confrontation with a very powerful source of temptation. As you read you may feel sympathy or pity towards Felix. If not, you are a heartless, thoughtless, empty shell of a human. Nevertheless, read on, and discover just how commonplace temptation is in every human life.
Day 1
Chapter 1
Felix was panicking. He was being shaken to near unconsciousness by two cold hands grasping either shoulder. He tried to cry out, to yell, to shout out for help, but morning grogginess dulled his voice to a feeble groan. He shook pathetically in the grip of his attacker, twisting as far as his trapped shoulders would allow, but he felt no sign of weakening from the fingers holding onto him.
"Felix!" His opponent nearly yelled. "Felix, wake up! It's time to get ready for school!" Felix opened his eyes stupidly. As the veil of sleepiness slowly lifted, his mother gradually materialized before him. "Felix? You awake?" Felix could only manage to make a blunt "Uh-huh." His mother's lips spread into a full grin. She was plainly amused. "What on earth were you dreaming about, hon'? You were shaking so violently I thought I was going to have to call the ambulance." Her sarcasm just barely made it through the thick wall of sleep that still lingered in Felix's mind. "Nightmare." Was all he could manage to say. "Well take a shower. Nightmares make you smell."
Felix laughed, his voice still thick and syrupy after his abrupt awakening. "Ok, Mom. But first, can you do me a favor?" "Sure hon', what is it?" "Could you let me go?" His mother, previously oblivious to the fact that her fingers were still locked tightly around Felix's shoulders, obliged. "Thanks. I'll take my shower now." Felix walked out the door of his bedroom slowly, his muscles sore from tossing and turning.
"Hold on, hon'. What do you want for breakfast?" Felix stopped his slow stride and turned around, a thoughtful expression on his face. "Oh, just eggs will be fine." He said finally. "Ok, honey." His mother sounded disappointed. She always enjoyed a challenge and Felix's exotic tastes always gave her something new to cook. This morning, however, a simple meal of eggs was all she could do. "Thanks Mom." Said Felix sincerely. He really did appreciate her cooking his breakfast. Without her help his mornings would be a mess. "No problem, sweetie."
As Felix felt the hot water rhythmically beat against his back in a soothingly hypnotic way, he remembered his dream in more and more detail. He had been walking along a beach, an endless expanse of coastline, the sand soft beneath his feet. As he listened to the waves washing up around his legs, he realized that he was not alone. It was not in a scary way, as one might feel when being watched in real life. He was just acknowledging another presence beside his own. He looked over to see who this new arrival into his dream had been. A beautiful girl, no older than himself, was walking alongside Felix. She looked at him at the same time that Felix did. Their eyes met and they both smiled. Felix was amazed by the whiteness of her teeth and her perfect complexion.
They walked for a long time, having wordless conversations with their eyes. Every once in a while, the girl would laugh, and Felix would laugh along with her. She was so charismatic, in a way that Felix could not resist. Then there was a path leading away from the beach. The girl started heading in that direction, but Felix was not so nonchalant. She turned her head, so that she was facing Felix. Her eyes were so irresistible. How could he not go along with such an angelic girl? She reached for Felix's hand, and they continued walking, fingers interlocked. The contact made Felix uneasy, and he knew this was not the right direction, but it felt so pleasurable. He couldn't stop even if he had wanted to.
Eventually the path ended and there was a cliff. Felix stopped in his tracks, avoiding the obvious peril ahead. The girl was not so hesitant. She kept walking ahead, and Felix communicated to her that she should stop. He pulled his hand out from hers and took a step back. She turned around, her eyes welcoming. They seemed to say, Oh, come with me. It will be fun. Don't you like me? Felix suddenly felt conflicted. He didn't want to walk off the edge of the cliff. That was just plain stupid and there was no point. But he really did like the girl. When they had been walking, he had felt more and more attached to her. But his mind was made up. He turned around and started walking. She was not worth the danger.
He suddenly realized he couldn't let her walk off the edge either. He turned around to try to persuade her from walking towards an obvious suicide. However, when he looked back, the beautiful girl was gone. In her place was I hideous beast, ten feet high with black scales covering the whole expanse of her body. Terror instantly spread through Felix. He turned and started to flee, but like in most dreams, he couldn't move an inch. A giant clawed hand reached for him. The long, cold, scaly fingers crushed his fragile body.
The beast turned him around, looking him in the eye. The scaly, black lips pulled back to reveal enormous, sharp fangs. Felix struggled, but it was pointless. The monster was going to eat him alive. He closed his eyes tightly, waiting for the talons to shred his body to ribbons.
The water in the shower suddenly became boiling hot. Felix jumped in surprise and pain. Swearing a stream of curses, he hastily shut the water off. He stepped out of the shower, wincing at his scalded back. He grabbed a towel and gingerly dried himself off. After the shock had worn off, he started thinking about his dream. It had been so perfect, so amazing, until the angelic, beautiful girl took him down the path leading away from his own. She had misled him, and he had taken the bait. It had all gone downhill from there. He thought about it more and more as he got dressed.
The girl, suddenly turning into the beast and attacking him. It had been so... scary. He wondered if it had any meaning. He sighed to himself and in doing so, inhaled the aroma of delicious eggs, coming from the kitchen. He supposed that whatever his dream had meant would have to wait until his stomach was full.
For anyone who was patient enough to read that all, thanks and please give me feedback.